Category: Calm

To Everyone Separated From a Loved One or Family at Easter

16/4/2019

To everyone separated from a loved one or family at Easter,

I know how hard it is to step into Celebrations at any time of year if you have a loved one that has died or if you are estranged from family.
The loss is deep.
The loss is heartbreaking.
It feels overwhelming.
It feels so sad.
The pain is so deep.
You just want to run away from it but you can’t.
You take it wherever you go.

I know this because I’m living it.

So what do I do?
I write about it.
I talk about it.
I give myself the space to acknowledge the pain and hurt.
I let the tears flow until they are spent and somehow I find myself coming out from the other side of the heartbreak.

Then I do things that support me.
I go for walks, I meditate.
I spend time with people I love.
I do things that bring joy to my heart.

So I just wanted to let you know that joy and sadness can coexist.

Jude xoxoxo

Author: 'Mum Moments - Journey Through grief' & 'Heartspace - Letters To My Mother'

LINKS

FACEBOOK
https://www.facebook.com/JudyTaylorGriefHealingLoveInspirationHope/

TWITTER
https://twitter.com/JudyTaylor2014

YOUTUBE
https://www.youtube.com/user/TheZergo123

PS WEBSITE
www.positivesigns.com.au

AUDIO
https://store.cdbaby.com/artist/positivesigns

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Love Is The Answer

11/12/2016

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Love is the answer

Many people throughout my life have told me they loved me. To them I say, “thank you”.

However, there is one person that is more important than all these people, one person I really need to love me… and that person is me.

You see, I know Jude intimately. I know her strengths and weaknesses, I know her joys and her laughters… and I also know her pain and her suffering.

I know that when I accept Jude as she is, all of her, and love her just the way she is, that I am experiencing a true love.

I know when I feel love deep inside of me and allow the love to support me every step of the way, that I will accept Love as the truth of who I am.

With this knowing I often say to people, “do you feel loved?” as an alternative to, “I love you”, because I know that if someone says to me, “I love you”, but I am not feeling much self-love at the time, then it’s difficult to believe them.

So, take a moment to embrace my thoughts. Then, if they resonate for you, practice loving yourself… all of you… the whole package … warts and all… and notice the effect this has on your life.

Love really is the answer.

Jude xoxoxo

by Judy Taylor

LINKS
Facebook:
https://www.facebook.com/Judy-Taylor-Grief-Healing-Love-Inspiration-Hope-724885690872207/
Twitter:
https://twitter.com/JudyTaylor2014
Amazon Author’s page:
http://www.amazon.com/-/e/B018LQJ5SC
Youtube:
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCPGoVDdQ3PG1YLJs4fA3QgA
Join Our Mailing List:
http://www.positivesigns.com.au/join-mailing-list.html
Audio Visualisations:
http://www.cdbaby.com/Artist/PositiveSigns

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The HOLIDAY I Needed ... the HOLIDAY I Got ...

20/7/2016

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Holidays are a great place to come home to the heart.

Port Douglas for 7 days. A dream holiday to escape winter.

Yes I did it… we drew on the 'FI Account' and booked a last minute deal with only 5 sleeps till we stepped on the plane and arrived at our beautiful tropical apartment with all the comforts we needed and literally a 2 minute walk to the beach.

All I wanted to do was relax by the pool, walk along the beach, swim, read my book and share the experience with John. We were in our own pocket of Paradise; so content cooking delicious meals on the BBQ, sipping on lattes and wine and enjoying just being. We both had new books to read and the TV remained off.

On day three John was feeling exhausted and not so enthusiastic about joining me for a walk saying: "I am so glad we booked this holiday. I really needed it". By day 4 his exhaustion and lack of enthusiasm hit him hard and it was obvious a bug had set in. First some coughing, then a runny nose and finally a headache that kept getting worse and finally became a migraine. So day 4, 5 and 6 of our holiday became a wipeout for John and the dream holiday experience for us as a couple became a nightmare!

So here I was with the holiday I wanted suddenly taken away from me. A roller coaster of emotions and feelings surfaced as I observed the situation and reflected on how it all turned out to be like this.

Ah yes… the back story.

Back to the week earlier when I booked the holiday package on the Thursday and our flight was early the following Tuesday.

On the Friday night John’s band was playing and one of the band members asked John for a lift to the gig. Halfway there he told us he was really sick with a bug!!!!!! I opened my window at that point! Not impressed! The next night - Saturday - they had another gig two hours away and he had already asked John for a lift to that as well. Why take two cars all that distance? But now I said to John, "not a good idea driving all that way with him so sick. Remember we have a holiday booked next week". Though concerned, John kept to the arrangement. They spent two hours driving there and two hours driving back on Saturday night!

So now, here we are in tropical Queensland on our amazing holiday and John has come down with the bug big time! It’s only day four!!! I was so pissed off and the emotions were bursting inside of me and out of me in waves.

WHOA!!!

This was a time to embrace all my feelings and find a way to make the most of the holiday… FOR ME!!!

So I allowed myself to walk with my anger along 4 mile beach and dug deep inside to find the essence of what this experience was triggering in me. It was deep… the feelings of 'you just have to understand'… 'this is the way it is'… 'you will just have to wait'… 'this is more important'… 'your needs will have to be put on hold'…

So, in essence, my programming was getting in the way of my needs.

So what happened?

Firstly I acknowledged the situation. The holiday I wanted with John was no longer happening, that was clear.
Secondly I expressed my feelings to John reminding him of 'the back story'. I really needed to get that off my chest. That said, my man was sick so I also expressed compassion. This was no fun for him either.
Thirdly I sprinkled eucalyptus oil all round the apartment to protect myself from his bug.
Fourthly, and most importantly, I made MY now solo holiday MY priority.

Everyday I had several walks along the beach. I swam in the warm ocean, I swam in the pool, I read my book. I treated myself to lattes and brunches overlooking the water at the marina. I met some wonderful people. I laughed, I cried, I felt pissed off then I enjoyed the freedom of being me again.

Some days were sunny, some were cloudy and some were raining. All in all the perfect environment for me to be in touch with all my emotions and feelings and celebrate being me.

Day 7 was the icing on the cake. While John was still weak he was able to join me at the marina and share some of the delights I had discovered and experienced while he lay in bed. The bonus was the sun that now came shining through even though the weather bureau had forecast heavy rain and possible storms on our last day in paradise.

As I reflect now ... It was the holiday I needed.

From John’s perspective I’m not so sure he would agree it was exactly the holiday he had in mind.

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Outside My Comfort Zone

22/3/2016

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Today I had a project I was working on which took me outside my comfort zone and I so wanted someone else to fix it for me.

John refused to rescue me. I was not happy.

I was stuck and reaching outside of me for the solution ... and then 'I got it'. My intuition reminded me to do what I do best in these situations: "write it out".

So I did ... It started with acknowledging "I'm stuck" and the words flowed from there.

In a short period of time my overview was complete and I was no longer 'stuck',

Reminder to me ... recognise and acknowledge my fears and listen to my intuition.

I now appreciate John's resistance to rescue me. It worked.

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Stuck In Childhood Perceptions . . .

4/3/2016

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Two and a half weeks ago I was living my mission one step at a time. The essence of me was shining brightly. I felt good. I felt challenged. I felt willing to continue on my pathway guided by my intuition.

And then ... for the last two weeks I've been stuck in my childhood perceptions of 'who I am' completely depleted of the 'inner knowing of the love that I am'.

I was triggered by a comment made by another person in my birth family about me. This trigger was so, so deep it penetrated way beyond the surface of the ‘me’ that loves and accepts me as I am and delved into the deep dark corners of blame, fault, fear and more.

My sense of self, my sense of knowing, my sense of ‘me’ fell apart as I allowed this dark vision of myself to present as I desperately attempted to push it away.

It was devastating. I was devastated and I felt the deep, deep helplessness of 'there is no way out' … 'there is no resolution' … 'there is just pain and suffering' …

I so, so wanted to fix this, just as I have wanted to fix this since I was a young child.

So, during this time I have been overwhelmed with emotions. I have sobbed my heart out. My solar plexus which is the energy centre for self love and self nurturing felt like it had completely collapsed and I felt like I didn't even want to get out of bed. I even felt like I just wanted to run away from it all.

In this time I have also taken steps each day to nurture myself even when I didn't feel like it. I got out of bed, I went for a walk, I went to the gym, I meditated. I wrote through the pain. I kept going gently one step at a time even when I didn't feel like it.

Then, this morning I turned the corner and came home to my heart.

The most powerful thing I did was I cared for ‘me’ throughout this time. I cared for and loved the 'inner child’ who was sobbing for her life … the little girl who was lost and alone and felt like no one understood her … the little girl who ‘didn't fit in' … the little girl ‘who just knew' … and through it all I found my little girl has grown into a radiant compassionate loving woman who knows how to find her way home to the love in her heart, and then share her wisdom and experience to help others.

When I look back I see I have spent a lifetime learning, making great choices, making mistakes, falling apart, healing myself and healing others. I am a sensitive intuitive just born to be ‘me’.

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Write It Out... Get It Out...

7/1/2016

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Okay ... I was caught up in some grief a friend is experiencing right now and somehow our conversation about something unrelated triggered responses that left us both feeling awful, like wounded children.

It became clear to me I needed to step out and go for a walk. I listened to my inner voice guiding me and went for that walk.

I began sobbing and sat down and wrote down exactly how I was feeling and by the time I had finished I felt a sense of calm.

Being human means we often have unresolved pain wounds which can be triggered by all sorts of things. In my experience they can be triggered in conversations that are often not directly related to the pain. I have found that stepping away from conversations with others at these times and listening to my inner voice, or writing my feelings down helps me gain an understanding of myself and what is happening with me. Writing is a powerful healing tool.

The added bonus from me getting to know myself and being more self aware is that sometimes I can recognise when others are triggered too. At these times I can often respond to them with compassion rather than reacting to my own issues. Sometimes I do this well… other times not.

My life is a work in progress where I do the best I can to live in the moment.

My wish is by sharing both my vulnerabilities and my strengths that I will help others to embrace their own personal healing journey.

Thank you for being here.